A Struggle

Hi Everyone!  I hope your week is going well for you.  Today, I wanted to share a little of my heart.  I have felt kind of isolated and honestly a little sad about the way my life is going.  You see, about 3 years ago I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia.  I was still in college and had a difficult time finishing, but I did.  I have been to numerous doctor's, been on tons of different medications, and yet it seems that my symptoms have just increasingy gotten worse.  Worse to the point that I find it difficult to do daily tasks like laundry, clean house, cook, etc.  And it makes me so angry!  I'm not gonna lie, I feel like this fibro has taken over my life. 

I'm not currently working due to fibro and I miss being able to interact with other people.  I do have daily interaction via social media with friends however, it really just isn't the same.  I sometimes feel like I am in a different world, like I'm looking at life from a locked room.  Over the past couple of months I traveled with my daughter to her competitions and honestly, it nearly killed me.  The pain was overwhelming however, I never let my daughter know how bad it was because I wanted her to have a good time...and she did.  However, what made me sad was that had I not had fibro I would have had a different experience, a better experience.

I often find myself looking at the world I'm surrounded by and thinking to myself "will I ever get to live the life I've always dreamed of"?  I've always wanted to travel abroad and see what the world has to offer.  To see how people live and gain understanding of our different ways.  I've always had the notion that traveling would allow me to take a deeper look into my soul and then share what I had learned with others.  However, the question in the back of my mind?  "Will I ever have the opportunity"?

I know that life will always have obstacles whatever your circumstances are.  But I just feel like the current obstacle (fibro) has really built a very tall wall that I'm having an incredibly hard time climbing.  With that, I wish you all well and God bless.

Always,
Christine